And now, for your favorite species of blog-post....

THINGS I HAVE LEARNED IN SPAIN, vol. IV

- A “yuppi” is not a snobby sophisticate. It is actually a really hip little café and convenience store type of place that is open 24/7. Think of it as a 7-11 except with class, and someone working to serve you sodas, snacks, and coffee.

- Rabbits, baby pigs, and baby lambs are not only cute, but also delicious and fashionable to wear on coats.

- It is unreasonable to expect an ISP to provide service for all of the 24 hours in a single day, much less EVERY day…

- Infants shop at boutiques that look way too high-society for American college students.

- Fred Flintstone’s alter Spanish ego is “Pedro Picapiedra”, and Barney is Pablo something or other.. I can’t remember his last name right now.

- A “Tabaco” stand only carries minimal amounts of actual tobacco products… it is mostly a magazine kiosk.

- Apparently I suffer from some sort of body temperature disorder, since I feel comfortable wearing a tshirt walking around in 17C (about 63F) weather, when everyone else is bundled up like it is the arctic tundra.

- If a person “turns into a Swede,” it means that they don’t care to understand or learn anything new. I have to wonder if this has some Viking roots.

- “Colon” is not a bodily organ, it’s a brand of detergent, or possibly a reference to Christopher Columbus.

- If you want to ditch someone or break up with your significant other, you “send them to fry asparagus.”

- You can buy scotch and whiskey pre-packaged with a liter of coca-cola…. Handy I guess?

- I imagine either the Spanish have more money than me or they all suffer from dehydration, because I have yet to see a single water fountain in any building…. But bottled water is available in any vending machine, of course.

- Symmetry is for suckers. Clothing, buildings, etc should be asymmetrical, for style.

- Coca-colas are ALWAYS served with lemon in restaurants.

- If you went somewhere with your friends and you all had a really good time, you “enjoyed yourselves like gnomes.”

- All clothing stores are organized by color… not style, article of clothing, size, price, brand, or anything like that. I suppose we can see where the Spanish priorities lie.